So, that “not enough” feeling. First of all, let’s define it; It’s that feeling when you’re ready to go live but you have this little voice inside of you that stops and makes you doubt yourself. You start to worry: What others are going to think when they see it? What if they knew that I don’t know all the answers? What if I’m live and somebody asks a question that I can’t answer? Those are just a few of the questions actually that came up this week. How do you stop holding yourself back? By keeping these things in mind.
You Are Not Alone
No matter where you’re at in your journey, one of the things that I want to assure you before I go any further is that everyone feels this way sometimes. Even the pros. If you’re teasing yourself by imagining that other people have their shit together, it’s time to be realistic. And you’re thinking when I’m in that future place, then I’ll have confidence, then I won’t have that imposter syndrome, think again. The finish line just keeps moving, because you lack the confidence in yourself. You can’t stop holding yourself back, because maybe you don’t quite believe in yourself yet. But please do.
You Do Deserve It
Somewhere deep down you don’t believe that you deserve it. Now, that’s a topic for a lot more than a 20-minute podcast, but we can start here at least. Just know that you really, truly deserve it. That will get you up and help you stop holding yourself back. Get excited, get enthusiastic, and remind yourself who you are. Anyone who told you different? They’re wrong.
The World Needs Your Unique Voice
There are some fitness “professionals” who aren’t qualified, who really can’t help, who are making mistakes, not intentionally, but because of a lack of education. You may see them a lot on your feed. They offer the quick fix, crackerjack box certification that really is a weekend certificate. That doesn’t really qualify them to be working with people with special injuries, special needs, conditions, and those needing TLC. And you know, that what’s between you and helping that client. The person who got them, who’s helping that client is very likely just in the right place at the right time with some message, any message that resonates.
If it upsets you to see someone unqualified winning those customers because they have better marketing strategies, then think about that before you go live. If you don’t get your message out there and make it strong enough, frequently enough, or with enough heartfelt clear conviction, you can’t win the clients who need you.
And if you can’t win clients you can’t help clients. If you can’t win and help clients, you can’t win revenue. You will then convince yourself that you can’t make any money doing this and you have to get a “real” job. Wow, that went downhill quickly, didn’t it? That’s probably not the direction you’re trying to go.
Everyone Has Imposter Syndrome
So let’s back up, back to this place. First of all, everybody feels imposter syndrome, on a regular basis. I would guess, daily, if they’re actually putting themselves out there. Listen, here’s the thing… Maybe this is the gauge of whether or not you are actively doing enough in your business. If you don’t feel imposter syndrome on a regular basis, you’re probably not regularly taking trips outside of your comfort zone.
It’s Good to Feel Uncomfortable
You’re not stretching outside of your comfort zone, not reaching new people, not being the first one to walk into the room and stick your hand out and be the one approaching someone instead of waiting to be approached. It’s hard to stop holding yourself back until you realize that this mild discomfort is temporary. And necessary. What I encourage you to do is find somebody that you really respect and you can open up to about questions you have.
Find a Mentor
Here’s what I’ve learned from mentors. When I first began spending the kind of money that I do now for masterminds. When I first plunked down my first $20,000 for a mastermind on an annual basis. First of all, I had never joined a mastermind for anything less. I just went all in, right to the top, pretty much the way I went from doing a sprint triathlon to doing an Ironman distance. Most people work their way up. I was all in.
When I did that, eight o’clock, day one of the first mastermind of the year, I walked into the room and literally met that coach at the door. I asked, “Have you ever felt like a really small fish in a really big sea?”
And she said…”Yes, all the time. I put myself there on purpose.” I was beyond shocked. I needed to know more.
She explained that her goal is to always be the most naïve person in the room. She wanted to surround herself with people who were smarter, who knew more, who could share more.
Find New Sources of Information
You have to be surrounded by people who have different opinions, different experiences, and different insights. People outside of your “comfort bubble” help you grow and stretch, because they don’t always think that everything you say is correct. And it will feel very uncomfortable at first, believe me. Just keep doing it. Stop holding yourself back because you don’t want to try something new. Since that first mastermind class, It’s been years and I’m reaching out to even more groups and doing the very same thing. Being the quiet person on the call who doesn’t ask questions really doesn’t help you at all. Ask for what you need, and you shall receive!
Getting Over Imposter Syndrome
How do you get over it though? Saying “you’re not alone!” may not be so helpful when the lights go on, that camera’s pointed at your face, and somebody is waiting for you to talk. I want you to remember this. It’s about them. Think of that first tip. Let it stir you.
There are so many marketers out there, winning people over by their quick fixes, by their “this is going to work and you’re going to lose 14 pounds in 14 days.” You know that they don’t care, that they can’t help. But you can. Think about those things.
Because if you don’t speak up, you don’t make your voice heard. If we don’t have more voices out there saying the right things, then the squeaky wheel gets the grease. It’s true. They’re out there giving the message people will hear over and over and over again. This is the one they’re going to respond to if you go dark and you go quiet. There’s not much response on the other end right?
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It’s About Them: What Do They Need?
So, think about those things and then remember, it’s about them. When you’re about to go live, and you start getting in your own head about what are they going to think… You’re in your own ego, worried about little old you and your “reputation.” Well, listen sister (maybe brother, or whoever may be listening) maybe you think a little bit too much about yourself.
Maybe the critics you’re picturing in your head aren’t thinking about you in the first place. Or maybe they’re not even real. And the whole goal of you going live is not about you. It’s not whether your hair is actually bleached as blonde as you want it, or your teeth are as white or your hair and clothes are stylish enough. It’s about the message that you’re about to tell them, how strong your conviction is in that message, and getting it across.
Do you know that it doesn’t really even matter if you get a little tongue tied while you’re on a live video? People will actually relate to you more because that’s human nature. That’s showing them the real you. If you take 10 takes to get it perfect, you’re probably never going to be satisfied with any one of them. You’re always going to be imperfect. This is the beautiful thing about people.
All those messages from people in the past who were critical, who didn’t support you, who made you feel “not enough?” They’re not here anymore. It’s you here, in control, making things happen for yourself.
So Stop Holding Yourself Back!
Now it’s up to you to shake that off and think about the people on the other side of the camera, and make it about them. What is it that they need to hear from you, right now, today before they go camp out on the couch instead of taking a walk, before they go to the cupboard and get something with a barcode instead of something nutritious? What do they need to hear from you?
So can you stop holding yourself back? Right now, today.
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Marketing to Women: https://www.fitnessmarketingmastery.com/copywriting-course/
Health & Fitness Business Scorecard: https://www.fitnessmarketingmastery.com/scorecard